Tv Trope Drabbles
by that.odd.kid.you.know
Summary: Drabbles inspired by clicking the 'random' button on TV Tropes and writing what comes out. Currently includes: Vice, K, Mizho, Paresse, Lady Gecko, Service, Musashi, and Sopha.
1. Beat Them at Their Own Game

Trope: Beat Them at Their Own Game

Time: Between Pilot Chapter and First Chapter, Four Months after K and Vice Met in 21st Century

Characters: K and Vice; From K's Point of View

"You're going to die," Vice whispers maliciously. "I'm going to track you down, K, and you're going to die."

I pause the X-box game and look at him. He is getting too into this game for my comfort zone. I had only bought it to amuse him, but this was slowly evolving into death threats.

Vice frowns at the split screen then turns to glare at me. "Why'd you pause it? I was about to shoot a grenade at you!"

"Vice, we are on the same team in this game. When you kept killing me, it was annoying. Now, it is just becoming creepy. Please stop." I try not to boss him around. What idiot would try to command a _robot_ who can make his hands turn into _guns_? I'm not going to be able to sleep tonight though if I listen to him any longer, so I turn back to the game and make my character jump out of the way of the grenade Vice had shot at me.

I am deeply relieved when he doesn't start the whispering again, but it still doesn't stop him from killing my player every five minutes. (There is another tense moment when Vice starts torturing my character, but lucky he gets the faint sense that this falls into the category of whispering about my death and stops.)

After two more hours of playing, we hit the end of the game. Our characters stand still, looking around with automatic rifles pointed forward. It's a desert. There isn't any shrubs or any rocks nearby, yet the game map has a red area in front of us, marked where the enemy would be.

"I'm switching to heat goggles," I say. My side of the screen goes black for a moment, and then the area underneath us is lit up, revealing a hundred foot long worm pointed directly at us.

"Son of a-" Vice says but the worm launching at us stops him. We both dodge out of the way of it and end up on either side. The monster proceeds to veer back and forth, trying to eat either of us before disappearing underground.

"What do we do?" he shouts.

The sand fills into the hole the worm made, and the music goes back to an ominous piano playing. "Someone has to go in and cut its inwards!" I shout back.

"You do it!" Vice shouts.

"No, you!" I shout back and then pause the game. "Rock-paper-scissors."

After a quick match of rock-paper-scissors, Vice is elected to go in.

Vice gives a single curse before hitting 'Play' and making his character jump through the monster's mouth.

"Alright, K! Combined fire!" Vice commands.

I watch the worm start to digest Vice's character even as he slashes it with a large sword. All the times Vice killed me while laughing start coming back to me. Revenge is a dish better served cold.

"No," I say setting my game controller to the side and picking up the popcorn bag we have for snacks. "I'm going to watch you be eaten."

Vice stares at me with a blank face for a second before fury flares up. On screen Vice's character turns to bones as the worm's stomach acid burns him.

"I win," I say before my fear-tightened throat closes and I start choking on my popcorn. As I try to cough the kennel back up, Vice rolls his eyes at me.

"You're lucky that something besides me is choking you." He goes to the main menu and presses 'New Game'. "Now, let's play again."


	2. Hula and Luaus

Trope: Hula and Luaus

Time: After the One Year Setback of the World's Destruction; The Evil Douji Club's Vacation to Hawaii, United States

Characters: Mizho and Parasse

Mizho couldn't help but feel like she had been tricked- some stupid trick that would end in someone's life being ripped out of them- but still a stupid trick. The horrible realization she was having though was that she had fallen for it.

In front of her lied an ocean full of half-naked people, jumping up and down in the waves, chasing each other, and in general being unconscious idiotic tourists. On the beach lied mounts of obese Americans who would only die drama-less deaths of heart disease.

Intertwined in these mounts of fat lied weak girls, ranging from a flat chested eight year old in a bikini to sixty year old cougars. All of them hoped that some equally idiotic, horny male figure would provide them self-worth by calling their chests and asses 'fine'. They hoped that said male figure also has a large penis and a small amount of stomach fat.

She loathed all of them.

"Remind me. Who said what that convinced me to go along with this, and why did I agree?" she asked partly to herself and partly to Paresse, who actually seemed comfortable on the beach towel in his claimed area of sand.

Paresse opened his eyes slightly and stared at the deep blue sky with clouds drifting over. "Something about…volcanoes," he said slowly. "You seemed interested."

"How did I get to the beach instead of hiking to see the volcano?" she challenged.

Paresse's eyes drifted to where his master was standing with her arms crossed in a bikini. _He has boobs,_ he remarked to himself, amazed._ Uh, that is still weird to see him as a teenage girl._

He sighed. "Fussa was going hiking. You preferred the beach."

She was silent for a moment and then said, "Oh, yeah. Now I remember. He's a creep. If he didn't have a douji I would have tortured him to death a long time ago for flirting with me."

Paresse yawned and started drifting off to sleep again. Mizho glanced down at her douji. His short, blonde hair was curving multiple ways from not wearing a hat. Somewhere he picked up an oversized white, long sleeved t-shirt and solid black swimming trunks.

An idea suddenly occurred to Mizho. It was an immature idea. If she was still Dubois it would be called unreasonable and childish. Then again, he was a fifteen year old girl; also, he always was a tad crazy. It was the only way to get some excitement today.

…

The next time Paresse woke up he was neck-deep in sand. He laid for a moment wondering what could have happened and what this would even be exactly until he saw the sign. A cardboard sign had the words 'Severed head' written in flowing, black marker with an arrow pointed at him. It was held up by Popsicle sticks.

"I think it looks great," Mizho's voice pointed out from behind him. Paresse leaned back and had an upside-down view of Mizho sucking on a banana Popsicle in a lawn chair.

Paresse felt the need to ask something like 'Why?' or 'How old do you have to be to find this funny?'. It might even have been appropriate to point out that he wasn't comfortable with teenage boys seeing the outline of her- whatever humans call it. If he was still physically a he, you would see the outline of his penis. Instead, it was a curvy whatever, and it made him feel like stabbing anyone who looked at it. Then he would bleach his eyes.

He turned away from the upside-down view of his master and tried to wiggle out of the sand his was stuck in, but then he decided against it. It was actually relaxing, encased in warm sand. Also, he didn't want to give Mizho the satisfaction of his escape attempt.

So Paresse and Mizho spent their vacation in Hawaii, each enjoying it in their own way. Mizho discovered that eating popsicles and watching little kids be afraid of Paresse's 'severed head' was a good way of passing time.

Paresse discovered that, despite the noise and inappropriate dress styles, a beach was a good place to relax at.


	3. I Just Want To Be Free

Trope: I Just Want To Be Free

Time: 9th Century; After Her Death

Character: Lady Gecko; In Her Point of View

All I wanted out of life was freedom.

I spent every day with the same routine, the same people, and the same suitors trying to swoon me.

I had been taught at a young age that the people who lived outside of the walls were different from me. They almost became like another species that I had never seen or touched but knew not to go near.

Murder and theft were explained to me by my maids, so I became disgusted at the cruelty the peasants could inflict on each other. When I did see the world outside of my home, the poverty only caused me to abhor the outside world even more.

Maybe that was my mistake. I was raised in a blissful ignorance of life's cruelty. I didn't see the world in the way Yamato-sama did.

I am still overwhelmed with the cruelty and swiftness I was murder by Ultimo. That wrong he inflicted on me hasn't faded yet, and I doubt it ever will. I can guess that his motivation was caused by my ignorance though. My ignorance killed me in the end.

Still, despite my disgust for the outside world I felt the urge to gain my independence.

I was tired of living in a sheltered environment. The cage used to protect me also kept me from flying. I longed for my champion to save me from my cage, but I almost ended up trapped with Emperor Kotsutsubo.

Like any good samurai hero, Yamato-sama saved me just in time, and later he accepted me as his wife.

Despite how it ended, those few short months I was with him were the best days of my life.

Yamato-sama was my freedom.


	4. Platonic Prostitution

**Trope: Platonic Prostitute**

**Time: 21st Century; AU**

**Characters: _ and _**

"Um," I say unsure of my idea for a second. "I was wondering if I would just be able to talk instead of…you know."

"Instead of having sex," the young woman in the cut-off shirt and skirt clarifies.

"Yes." I am starting to regret the idea, but I am hoping that she won't mind. "Preferably I would like someone anonymous to talk to."

The woman looks like she considers it for a few moments before asking, "Will you still be paying me?"

I shift my hands into my pockets and bring out my meager amount of bills. "I only get five hundred yen of spending money monthly."

She stares at them for a moment before bursting into a round of laughter. "I'm sorry," she says trying to regain her composure, "but that's just sad. Are you unemployed or something?"

"No," I reply, hardly offended. I am aware that it isn't even enough money to buy a bag of candy. "I am a manager of a supermarket and have two part-time jobs on the side." Her eyebrows lift questioning. "My wife is very strict on money."

She nods in understanding and then sits on the room's desk. "Alright. Go on."

I hesitate. "You'll stay for five hundred?"

She shrugs. "I am under a pimp. Even if you pay me a one million yen I have a set amount I would get. He would get the rest of the money."

I take a seat on the cheap hotel bed. "Can you leave him? Or, I suppose, do you want to leave him? Do you get enough money for the necessities?"

She shakes her head back and forth. Her cheaply dyed blue hair brushes against her cheeks. "I don't have anything to rely on if I do leave. It's not like a business would hire me looking like this," she adds with a laugh.

She smiles kindly at me. "Don't worry about me, old man. I can take care of myself. Now, I think you were going to complain about your wife, or is that only part of your problems?"

I'm starting to feel like my problems are much less important compared to hers.

"Are you hungry?" I ask, standing up to get a bag of fries from a fast food restaurant I ate at earlier.

"No, no," she says holding up her hands and shaking her head. "Really, you don't have to."

"I don't mind." I smile at her. "I can't pay you much, so at the very least let me give you a meal."

I place the container of fries in the microwave and set it to cook. I lean against the counter and ask a question that had been bothering me since I opened the door for her.

"How old are you, if you don't mind my asking?"

She sits up straighter. "I'm old enough to be in this business, aren't I?"

"Are you?" I ask her. Her eyebrows lower slightly. "You look like you are sixteen at the very most."

She doesn't say anything for a couple of seconds, and the microwave beeping interrupts us. I pull the fries out and hand it to her. She sets it beside her on the desk and grins a bit at me. "I feel like this has become less about you and more about me."

I shrug a bit at the statement and smile kindly at her. "I was never good at talking about my problems anyway."

She blushes a bit and glances down at the floor. "Thanks, oldie," she says quietly, "for the food and all."

"Of course," I tell her.

In the following hour she tells me a little bit about her life. She says that she has five siblings and half-siblings. Her father was absent a majority of the time, so she and her siblings had to take care of themselves. She grew up in another large city by the ocean but ran away to Tokyo for a better life. She ended up caught in sex trafficking.

Despite my insisting, she refuses to go to the police, saying that she would end up in an orphanage where she would have less freedom than she does now. She then wants me to tell her about my life, so I reluctantly do.

I tell her a bit about my jobs and then about my critical wife who is never happy with what she has, always seeking what she doesn't. I tell her about my twenty-eight year old neet son who begs me for video games but doesn't take up the offer of a job at my business. I love them both, but they don't appreciate my efforts. They only want more and blame me if they don't get it.

"Why don't you leave them?" she asks.

I frown slightly. "They are my family. They depend on me."

"Yeah, but they treat you badly. You said so yourself. Why can you just say 'No, I work hard for you. You should be happy' to your wife and say 'Why don't you get a job?' to your son?" she insists.

I pause for a moment before replying, "People live in the realities they want to accept. They are still my family, and I have to take care of them, even if that means allowing them to continue living how they do."

"But you're not happy," she points out.

I shrug. "That is my own problem. I love them enough to sacrifice my happiness for them."

"But that isn't right!" She clenches her fists. "They should care about you the way you care about them! You're a good man, far too good for them to treat you like crap!"

"I could say the same for you," I point out. I am flattered, though, that she cares about me. I feel protective of her, and I want to get her out of the situation she is stuck in. I just don't know how to help her.

"You have the chance to leave your problems," she says. "I don't." She stands up and brushes her skirt off before smiling apologetically at me. "I should go. It was nice to meet you, oldie." She grins at me. "What is your name? At this point I might as well call you jisan instead of oldie."

I smile back at her. "My name is Yoichi Oizumi. I don't mind being called oldie or uncle. I would like to know your name too, if that is alright with you."

"Nowadays I'm am called Service more than anything," she says embarrassed.

I think for a moment before saying, "What about Kandai-sa? It suits you."

She looks at me stunned for a few seconds before laughing. She has to wipe her eyes quickly before replying. "That sounds…I would like that very much. Thank you." She places both hands on her hips and adds, "I'm not as graceful when it comes to names, so you're still going to be oldie to me."

"I don't mind," I reply, chuckling a bit.

We both stand still for a while looking at each other. It isn't very likely that we will meet outside of this hotel room.

I start to say, "Listen-"

"I think-" Kandai-sa starts at the same time.

We both pause to let the other continue. After a few seconds, Generosity laughs.

"If I don't get called for another job I can see you here next week, oldie, if you want to meet again that is," she tells me with a grin.

I smile back. "I would be honored to share your company."

She holds back a blush and then adds with mock sternness, "You have to bring some food- and not just for me. There has to be some for you too."

"Okay, I will."

She gives me a small wave before exiting the room. I stand still for a moment, feeling better than I have felt in possibly months. It dawns on me too late that she didn't even take my money.

Kandai-sa. Generosity. It really does suit her.

**Characters: Yoichi Oizumi and Service**


	5. I Take Offense to the Last One

**Trope: I Take Offense to the Last One**

**Time: After Forming of Good Douji Club, I guess. (Not too important this chapter.)**

**Characters: Musashi Murayama and Sopha**

"Musashi?"

I look up and see Sopha watching me on the edge of the roof. I go back to watching the sun make its way towards the horizon. I had hoped that I could escape for a while, but apparently that's impossible.

Sopha quietly sits down next to me and pulls his knees towards his chest. It's odd how thin he becomes when he is in his human form. He isn't very big in his douji form, but his weak frame is more apparent when he is trying to look human.

"We need to talk," he says quietly, and the forwardness catches me off-guard. I turn towards him, and he turns to look at me directly too.

"Alright," I agree passively, not sure where this will lead, "I'm listening."

He looks back at the forest and bites his lip before saying slowly, "We have…a difficult relationship. Neither of us chose the other to be the other's partner. You didn't want to be my master, and I didn't have any choice in the matter. Still," he looks back up at me, "we complement either other in our own way."

I don't know what to say, so I continue to listen. He turns back to the forest and continues.

"I've tried to be a good page to you, a good douji. The week after Dunstan left us in this century I left you alone because you told me to. When you wanted me to stay with you I was overjoyed and stayed. I thought that maybe we both could bond and grow closer, but that wasn't the case."

I think back to when I woke up in the present. I was confused and injured. Once I knew what time zone I was in I knew I couldn't trust anyone. I was angry at Dunstan, and it felt even more of an insult to have a robot I didn't want following me everywhere I went.

_Go away! Leave me alone! I don't want you! I'm not going to be your master!_

_The boy- no, douji- stares at me with wide eyes and backs away._

_I continue walking through backstreets, trying to find a place I could possibly stay at for the night until I can fix my arm and hunt Dunstan down. Sometimes in the corner of my eye I can see the douji's blonde hair, but he's hidden whenever I turn around._

_Finally I become desperate and ask a sushi owner for help. He is kind and helps me. Just before the shop door closes I can see the douji standing in the alley across the street watching me enter without him._

"I was injured." I'm angry that he's bringing this up. "I had lost everything and everyone I loved. Being your master wasn't exactly one of my priorities at the time."

"I was injured too!" he shouts at me before frowning at the ground below. "I still am, in fact, but you can't even love me enough to heal me."

He clenches his teeth and hugs his knees harder.

"I'm sorry," he apologizes quietly a few seconds later. "It just hurts, in more ways than just one."

I watch him and then watch the coming sunset.

"I'm sorry too," I tell him. I'm sorry that I can be a better master for him. I'm sorry I abandoned him. I'm sorry I can't love him. I wish I could explain to him about how I can love only certain people ever since my parents died- how I swore to myself not to love anyone ever again because the hurt was too deep-, but it would make me sound even more selfish.

We sit in silence for several more minutes, watching orange etch across the sky.

I never watched the sunset when I lived in the future. Why was that? Was I always so busy I never noticed the sunset? Now it seems like it never mattered. I would give almost anything to have my sister with me now and watch the sunset with her.

"We can be stronger, even if you don't love me. There are ways," Sopha says and pulls me out of my thoughts.

"How?"

"If we actually talk, for one." He looks at me directly again. "You don't talk to me very much, and when you do you treat me like I'm your slave or weapon to use without a thought. Talking and syncing together would make us stronger. I don't enjoy having, what Service calls, my ass kicked every time you challenge someone to a fight. By the way, stop challenging people to fight."

Multiple questions and statements run through my head, but I choose to ask, "Since when has Service given you his opinion on my decisions? It isn't his business."

"We have group support meetings," he explains and continues staring at the sun.

Multiple questions. "Why?"

"It's a good way to collaborate our opinions and ideas without worrying about what our masters think. What to do about you and feeling pity towards me have become popular topics. It's part of the reason why I'm telling you all of this. An unnamed individual threatened to confront you on being a better master if I didn't say anything myself."

I don't have to make any wild guesses on who it might be. Then again, it feels like most of the douji dislike me, so it could have been any one of them. "Alright then. What are some of the opinions passed around?"

Sopha is quiet for a moment. "Well…one is that I chose another person for a master because you are 'unfit'."

I don't say anything for a few seconds. "What do you think about that?" I ask after a while.

Sopha looks up at me and smiles softly. "Meh, I'm too fond of you. I figure even if you aren't the best master now, there's a chance you'll get better."

He still has hope, even after everything I've put him through. "What do you want to talk about?"

"Well." He thinks about it for a moment. "I want you to teach me what wisdom is. I've been searching online, and I haven't learned much, just that it is different from intelligence and is associated with old age. Details beyond those two are vague."

"Alright, I'll do better." I smile partly out of amusement. "You're more talkative than I thought."

He smiles back. "You're not as big of an ass."

"I'm not an ass," I argue offended. "Why do people think I am an ass? Who says that?"

Sopha gives me a sideways grin while watching the fading sky. "I do, but it's okay."

I huff at him. "You better put in a good word for me at those meetings," I mutter.

Sopha bursts into laugher and laughs so hard tears start forming at the corners of his eyes. He wipes them away and beams at me. Despite myself, I smile back.

_Yeah, it could get better._


End file.
